One thought on “Can suicide ever be funny? Watch this!”
RE-VAMPING THE SUICIDE RULES
Suicide is no longer against the law (interesting, who were they going to prosecute? and could it have meant a jail term??), BUT if you triy and fails to complete the act you may well, and probably will, be incarcerated anyway. With the added disadvantage of an indeterminate term at the behest of Her Majesty, being physically molested with drugs, electrocution, direct force i.e. being man-handled, or mechanically held down by shackles for an indeterminate time, seclusion (solitary confinement, also for an indeterminate time), among other abuses. Once the drugs overwhelm you, you will probably not be able to protest about anything. Anyway it was protests that got you in there in the first place.
You will be treated with cold detachment and resentment by the staff who have resuscitated you because you are not deserving of their compassion. You are a bad, stupid, selfish, thoughtless, wicked and evil sinner whose behaviour is deemed unforgiveable by your family, other loved ones and God, and you will surely burn in Hell for it, as you deserve. This last may not worry you too much as you almost certainly feel you’re already there.
If you’re unfortunate enough to meet up with Staff who have been involved with you before, you will be at the receiving end of their outrage that you haven’t been grateful for all their `help’ and may be verbally abused for making them feel like failures.
You will not be told your rights as a citizen of your own country. You will not be able to organise a legal advocate or lawyer, partly because you will be almost asleep most of the time, and staggering and slurred if you do manage to stand up, and nobody will tell you who these people are or how to make contact.
You probably won’t have access to your telephone, if you have one, to call for help from friends and/or family, because it is being `kept safe’ for you and you won’t be allowed to have the charger anyway. Then, if you can find a public phone, you’ll need some coins and have to try and remember the phone numbers you need through the fog of the un-named drugs that may have been injected into you without your consent. So you ask the nurses to help. But they have no time – between a cup of tea and a smoke break – to call for you.
After a subjectively long time (days, weeks, you won’t know), someone may tell you that in an hour you have to face a `Tribunal’ to `plead’ your case. If you’re unlucky a psychiatrist you’ve never met will give you `emergency’ ECT (but won’t tell you what that is or why), an hour or so before you get to front the Tribunal so you’ll be feeling calmer. You will never remember the Tribunal or the psychiatrist for that matter. If you’re lucky you’ll only get enough drugs to bring you to a standstill, but at least you won’t get a headache, and you’ll almost be aware of your own name.
During this time you will be vulnerable to alarming side-effects of these drugs, including being unable to stand still, lie or sit down. You may get a horrible sensation of having the feeling of `things’ crawling about inside you, in your brain, body. It has no name and there are no words to describe it. When you pace about, or run to try to relieve these feelings, they will call you uncooperative and lock you in solitary or strap you to a bed. This is where you go mad.
You may also get a gross facial tic that will never get better, and the feeling that you have a huge colony of fire ants swarming just under your skin, and get brain damage from any or all of these things which makes suicide an even more attractive option.
When you plead with them to stop the drugs, if anyone speaks to you at all, they’ll tell you it’s quite normal and `for your own good’.
But, if you, a citizen, kill someone else, you may be incarcerated alone in a cell until a lawyer comes, for no more than 24 hours and usually more like two. You may get bail and go home albeit under an order, or be remanded until your case gets to court. This may be reviewed every day. You will not receive drugs, ECT, brain damage, facial tics or movement `disorders’. You will be permitted to demand a telephone and will be free to call whomever you like. Unless you become seriously violent no one is permitted to man-handle you, or drug you, or give you an electric shock.
The law says these thing are not permitted to be used as behavior controls and can only be used to manipulate `dangerous madmen’. You are just a criminal and you’re lucky because the law gives out sentences that are defined, so that you’ll know how long you will be incarcerated, and that there will be an end, for most. Eventually you will get to court and lawyers will plead your case. Between your incarceration and your appearance in court you will get to discuss your case with a solicitor and a barrister on several occasions. No one may force you to have any kind of `treatment’, no one can make you `change’ if you don’t want to. But you will be able to change yourself, study and get qualifications to make yourself a future for when you do get out.
However, you as a `mental patient’, not a criminal, will have your future all mapped out too, for your entire life. The law will insist that you continue with the drugs for your much shortened lifetime, because you can only `control’ your `illness’, because there is no cure for what you have. If you ever manage to get free of the drugs, you will be pursued and re-incarcerated and around we go again.
Suicide? Get it right or your `life’ will be a very long obliteration of your life!
Thinking About Suicide 
RE-VAMPING THE SUICIDE RULES
Suicide is no longer against the law (interesting, who were they going to prosecute? and could it have meant a jail term??), BUT if you triy and fails to complete the act you may well, and probably will, be incarcerated anyway. With the added disadvantage of an indeterminate term at the behest of Her Majesty, being physically molested with drugs, electrocution, direct force i.e. being man-handled, or mechanically held down by shackles for an indeterminate time, seclusion (solitary confinement, also for an indeterminate time), among other abuses. Once the drugs overwhelm you, you will probably not be able to protest about anything. Anyway it was protests that got you in there in the first place.
You will be treated with cold detachment and resentment by the staff who have resuscitated you because you are not deserving of their compassion. You are a bad, stupid, selfish, thoughtless, wicked and evil sinner whose behaviour is deemed unforgiveable by your family, other loved ones and God, and you will surely burn in Hell for it, as you deserve. This last may not worry you too much as you almost certainly feel you’re already there.
If you’re unfortunate enough to meet up with Staff who have been involved with you before, you will be at the receiving end of their outrage that you haven’t been grateful for all their `help’ and may be verbally abused for making them feel like failures.
You will not be told your rights as a citizen of your own country. You will not be able to organise a legal advocate or lawyer, partly because you will be almost asleep most of the time, and staggering and slurred if you do manage to stand up, and nobody will tell you who these people are or how to make contact.
You probably won’t have access to your telephone, if you have one, to call for help from friends and/or family, because it is being `kept safe’ for you and you won’t be allowed to have the charger anyway. Then, if you can find a public phone, you’ll need some coins and have to try and remember the phone numbers you need through the fog of the un-named drugs that may have been injected into you without your consent. So you ask the nurses to help. But they have no time – between a cup of tea and a smoke break – to call for you.
After a subjectively long time (days, weeks, you won’t know), someone may tell you that in an hour you have to face a `Tribunal’ to `plead’ your case. If you’re unlucky a psychiatrist you’ve never met will give you `emergency’ ECT (but won’t tell you what that is or why), an hour or so before you get to front the Tribunal so you’ll be feeling calmer. You will never remember the Tribunal or the psychiatrist for that matter. If you’re lucky you’ll only get enough drugs to bring you to a standstill, but at least you won’t get a headache, and you’ll almost be aware of your own name.
During this time you will be vulnerable to alarming side-effects of these drugs, including being unable to stand still, lie or sit down. You may get a horrible sensation of having the feeling of `things’ crawling about inside you, in your brain, body. It has no name and there are no words to describe it. When you pace about, or run to try to relieve these feelings, they will call you uncooperative and lock you in solitary or strap you to a bed. This is where you go mad.
You may also get a gross facial tic that will never get better, and the feeling that you have a huge colony of fire ants swarming just under your skin, and get brain damage from any or all of these things which makes suicide an even more attractive option.
When you plead with them to stop the drugs, if anyone speaks to you at all, they’ll tell you it’s quite normal and `for your own good’.
But, if you, a citizen, kill someone else, you may be incarcerated alone in a cell until a lawyer comes, for no more than 24 hours and usually more like two. You may get bail and go home albeit under an order, or be remanded until your case gets to court. This may be reviewed every day. You will not receive drugs, ECT, brain damage, facial tics or movement `disorders’. You will be permitted to demand a telephone and will be free to call whomever you like. Unless you become seriously violent no one is permitted to man-handle you, or drug you, or give you an electric shock.
The law says these thing are not permitted to be used as behavior controls and can only be used to manipulate `dangerous madmen’. You are just a criminal and you’re lucky because the law gives out sentences that are defined, so that you’ll know how long you will be incarcerated, and that there will be an end, for most. Eventually you will get to court and lawyers will plead your case. Between your incarceration and your appearance in court you will get to discuss your case with a solicitor and a barrister on several occasions. No one may force you to have any kind of `treatment’, no one can make you `change’ if you don’t want to. But you will be able to change yourself, study and get qualifications to make yourself a future for when you do get out.
However, you as a `mental patient’, not a criminal, will have your future all mapped out too, for your entire life. The law will insist that you continue with the drugs for your much shortened lifetime, because you can only `control’ your `illness’, because there is no cure for what you have. If you ever manage to get free of the drugs, you will be pursued and re-incarcerated and around we go again.
Suicide? Get it right or your `life’ will be a very long obliteration of your life!